Well of Illusions!

Monday, August 20, 2007

oh man this feels cool? i really hope she will know and move her heart for everything i've did. im so so afraid she will leave me. sigh. i love her seriously. loving her fills my life with more colourful colours. she brightened up my life. love you.

please visit http://www.acidcrue.blogspot.com/

+KenDriK+ updated @ 6:03 AM

-------------------------------

Sunday, August 19, 2007

well although i've done so much, maybe its still not enough for me to win her heart. its the time that matters. i doesn't know her long enough. and i hate everything and my timidness for inviting her in my friendster. i hate i hate i hate! im feeling terrible now. nothing seems right since. i hate myself. i feel like sliting my wrist and let the blood gush out of my veins and die. i really feel like dying. i gave her everything but i got nothing in the end. haha thats life. love is so fucked. love can turn someone nasty. love can turn someone mad. love can turn someone into depression. but once you got love, everything seems so right. as if you have the entire world in your hands. im such a failure. i didn't have a chance to obtain the entire world. fuck up life fuck up world fuck up person i am. and its cool. does cutting myself feels good? nah its stupid. cutting myself wont make me die. maybe sliting my wrist? oh cool. all people says time heals time heals. lets observe if time really heals. im not that fortunate to have your love although you got my love. good luck to yourself and the person you love. god bless. i cant take this kind of stress. i'll take a rest im dying.

+KenDriK+ updated @ 8:49 AM

-------------------------------

Friday, August 17, 2007

my blog song is specially dedicate to this special girl. hope she will see this post.

"Your Guardian Angel"

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me
I can be the one
I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you
I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

+KenDriK+ updated @ 11:48 PM

-------------------------------

Thursday, August 16, 2007

its been days since i've heard from her. dont know what she is doing now. im just feeling weird without her nags and chats. i feel so empty inside. idling around my house when im sick thinking of what might be doing now or why she didn't reply my msges. im just so lost. hope she will be back there for me again. time and time again i'd promise her to quit smoking and im always hang on to the promises i made for her. i want her back again nagging me to study everyday. sighh.. every night before i slept i will think of some possible reasons to solve the enquires in my heart. is it something happened thats why she didn't contact me? or is it she found out something that hurt her or something which i even know what it is. or is she trying to ignore/ avoid me just because she can concentrate on her work more? im just totally confused. really wanted her to help me solve all these questions. where is she?! can she appear in my dreams to tell me or give me a msg? every morning i wake up, the first thing i look is my phone. hoping i will receive a msg from her. even if its a "hey" or just "good morning" it will brighten up my day for sure. but it seems i didn't receive any. i really miss her lots. all these days without her msges i've been feeling very moody. dont wanna talk to other people even my friends but just her. she is nowhere near me. i will wait and wait till you give me a reply or a call. i need you seriously. i dont have the mood to revise my work without your naggings

remembering the last msg i've got from her: "sorry im kinda busy today. um talk tmrw? sorry."

is there some meaning behind these words?

this msg have been reciting in my mind all these while. where are you?

i miss you so.. please let me know you are still there for me.

+KenDriK+ updated @ 3:01 AM

-------------------------------

Friday, August 3, 2007

hey peeps. its my care and share session for today. it goes like this....
have you ever changed somethings when you met a girl?

i do! things started to changed since i met her. i've changed(although she said its ok). because ehhh.. i dont know either. just have a feeling of changing just for her. its her and her. she seems special to me. she look so pleasent to my eyes and my heart just starts to "pop" whenever i sees her. whats the meaning of this? i will and i will continue.

alright peeps. the end!

the special girl seems to had moved my heart.

+KenDriK+ updated @ 8:40 AM

-------------------------------

Thursday, August 2, 2007

alright thanks all my bros and sis for supporting me. i love you all TAN CHANG AN! HANXIANG. TAN YEW QIAN. JUNTING, CASSANDRA, MICHELLE HO AND JOEN! love! you guys to the core. best friend i've ever met. we gone through thick and thins together. really love our friendship. AND guess what?! IM BACK TO KENDRIK AGAIN! the cheerful and talkative boy! love to meet up sometime. =) lots of things to share about. MSG ME MY FRIENDS. misss all to the core!

love emo kids!

+KenDriK+ updated @ 5:25 AM

-------------------------------